After my trip to Provincetown, I decided to send Dr. Perfect Hair a text. He wouldn’t have given me his number if he didn’t want me to contact him, right? The text was witty and pithy but I could tell with the curt reply that my fears were confirmed. My HIV proved to be a bit too much for him. Or could it have been something else?
Let me explain:
Like every good gay I like to make myself presentable. This includes the intricate art of manscaping. If you have the blessing/curse to grow body hair like a chia pet, you can do one of three things.
1. Shave yourself completely smooth and pretend that you are a twink;
2. Trim yourself – While you are still true to yourself, you are not overgrown; or
3. Embrace the hair and become a bear or an otter or whatever animal you wish to be called.