Always Let Your Conscious Be Your Guide

As I re-entered the world of singledom, after the South African, some things became disturbingly clear

I realized that I have a post break-up habit.  Some people get a drastic hair cut. Some people gain or even lose 15 lbs. For me, after a relationship ends I tend to become a true believer in free love.   During which I made good use of all of my gentleman’s socializing networks. I could be found chatting with guys at the gym, at work, at home.  I would even travel the length of Manhattan to partake in an extra long lunch break. Just to clarify, this was NOT my prior lunch date.  Within the midst of my newly rejuvenated spurt of free love, there were a couple observations that shocked and confused me.

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Could’ve Been So Beautiful, Could’ve Been So Right

After the lackluster first sexual encounter with Martin, I was determined that it would indeed get better. After all, we are both attractive men in our mid 30s and we like each other, so there is nothing stopping us from having no-holds-barred-animalistic sex. Right? At least that is what I was hoping for. I like Martin, I really do and I want us to work. I don’t want you to get the wrong impression, but we all know that sex is a fairly large component in a new relationship.

I’m sure you know me well enough by know to know that I had a plan a brewin’. This what I finally decided upon: First, I would stop off and get two gourmet cupcakes. Who doesn’t love a good cupcake? Secondly, I would meet him at his apartment and I would say “First I want to ravage you. Then I want to ravage these.” Brilliant. Sexy. Fun. Sweet. Continue Reading…

Once Bitten, Twice Shy

Even though after Martin returned from his mini trip to Montreal and squashed most of the craziness that was circling around in my brain, we were still having a hard time getting together. And by getting together – I mean having sex. He was busy with school,  I was working a lot and our schedules were not quite meshing. I had never felt so chaste in my life!

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Twitterpation

“Nearly everybody gets twitterpated in the springtime. For example: You’re walking along, minding your own business. You’re looking neither to the left, nor to the right, when all of a sudden you run smack into a pretty face.”

I was still on Cloud  9 for days after my first date with Martin, the South African. Unfortunately for me, Martin, who was in the process of getting his MFA in creative writing, had absolutely no free time. And to make it worse, the following weekend he was going on trip to DC, then had houseguests, and was then taking a long weekend trip to Montreal to visit his sister. Needless to say, we were hard pressed to find any time to hangout.  Continue Reading…

A Hunchback in the Clouds!

They say that spring is the time for lov. It’s rapidly approaching and I have been frustrated with my dating landscape, so I decided to have a little fun on OkCupid For those out there that don’t utilize that site, your profile is basically a collection of the most generic questions possible to describe yourself to a prospective date. These questions include: What Am I Doing With My Life (Seriously? This question sounds like it comes from a disappointed parent.), I’m Really Good At (If you have some spare time, you should read people’s responses, they are hilarious!), and the list goes on from there. Having no recent luck with the site and on-set of spring-like weather, I had a crazy idea. I decided to make my profile into bit of a joke.

 The First Thing People Usually Notice About Me…

….My charming personality or maybe my hunchback, it’s a tossup.

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I’m Not Always the Good Guy

I am not always the good guy. I am not always the guy who, because of being HIV-positive, looses out in love. Sometimes, just sometimes, I find myself in the role of the bad guy.  And when that happens, I don’t know why but I truly commit to that role.

Let me explain.

The tall guy, David, did indeed ask me on a date. It was your typical date: coffee and a movie. He was very sweet, smart and yes, very tall.  After the date, David did the gentlemanly thing to do, and walked me home. Before you ask, I did not invite him up to my apartment, but he did have to lean far down to give me a good night kiss. Continue Reading…

Something New

Ever notice how most New Yorkers (and yes, I consider myself one even though I have only been a resident in this great city for less than two years), do their best to avoid Times Square? If we must be in the area, we concoct a plan to stay far away from the roaming masses of tourists, even if it means we take the most circuitous route to our destination. This avoidance of Times Square becomes even more evident on December 31st.  Last year I even fled the country to be far, far away from the ball and its infamous dropping.

This year I was invited to a party on the fourth floor of an office building overlooking the center of Times Square. Initially, my instinct was to politely decline the invitation and  keep clear of the  crowds. But alas, Brian (one of my best friends) was coming up from Philly for the weekend and once I mentioned the party, it became the one thing he wanted to do. Being the good friend that I am, I acquiesced and we prepared to descend upon the eye of the storm. Continue Reading…